The Hardest Day

I feel like I'd like a little snack.  I feel like a big stack of short ribs would make for a nice little snack. Sounds like it could make for a lovely Sunday.  

It's been about 60 hours since my last meal. Since then it's been only water and herbal teas, with the exception of a small amount of earl gray. Of course. To be clear, a true water fast isn't supposed to allow for herbal teas and especially no caffeine- I've tailored mine to include small bits of black and herbal teas- becasue that gives me bigger joy and doesn't change things significantly if at all.

Of all of the fasts I've done- too many to recollect (juice and master cleanses)- this water fast is by far the hardest.  no doubt. What's the difference? Oh, probably a few 500 calories a day or something. 

Today the symptoms I had been dreading set in.  I feel weak. Really weak. And that shaky hungry feeling is setting in, I'm surprised it took so long.  When I got out of bed I felt a little light headed. And my heart is a little thumpy- it feels a little faster, a little stronger.  I'm familiar with tachycardia so it no longer scares me but I still don't like it. This is only temporary. This is only temporary. This is ONLY temporary.

I measured my level of ketosis, seems like I'm somewhere around 8, which is quite high for the number of days I'm in so far.  I'm a fast ketosier.  quite ketosy. 

I am not going to have those short ribs I so badly want. This is where it gets interesting.  This is where I tell myself that I can go on.  I can get through this.  I can tap into deeper reserves in my mind, and those will help me tap into deeper reserves in my body, and I will go another day.  I will go to work today (only 3 hours) and I will get home and figure out how to better use my time.  yoga. a walk. maybe some writing, some reading. maybe i'll go lie in the sun and soak up some vitamin D, I could use it. But I will make it through today, the hardest day, because I know while it might be hard it won't kill me, and after today, things are supposed to get easier.  I hope so because tomorrow is a harder work day and I'll need to be tapping into those promised reserves. 

Right now the only reason I can give for doing this is to prove to myself I can.  I know there is more to it, but maybe not. Right now I can't remember the other stuff.   

So far this fast has felt pretty humorless.  I am really looking forward to some minor delirium or something to lighten things up.